Silly putty makes work tolerable

Dear L

I thought I told you to stay out of my dreams,

I mean really, this has gone to far now

Its been almost 8 years since we talked, you have 2 kids now!

I don’t understand why you insist on popping up in my dreams insisting that we go skiing or taking long elevator rides together.

While it was a very nice dream full of cuddling and stuff, I am sure if I saw you now I would none of it, (The Hungarian has been doing a splendid cuddling Job!). So once again I plea to you KEEP OUT OF MY DREAMS, but if you know say Ryan Glosing, or my old Favorite Jonathan Jackson, tell them that my dreams are available any time!

All the Best,

Me

at least i know i am not going crazy

Tar beaching it on my roof

Soda, book, bathing suite and Sun,

Happy memorial day peeps

Running

I can run hung over in some old grannie undies

Feel like shit druing the run

But still feel sexy as hell in the end…

Happy Sunday Ya’ll time to get some sun on my roof…

As a non smoker

I get stuck watching the drinks…

But when I’m 60 without COPD I’ll get the last laugh!

This is what happens when I answer a page out of courtesy to let the person paging me know I am not weekend coverage..

Me: Hello this Social Worker I see that I was paged, but I am not on call you can page....

Doc: Ohh Hi Social Worker! I know you’re not in, but I had a question to ask about one of your patients that we share, and it’s your pager # on the social work clearance form. Pt. X is ready for discharge tonight but he needs a visiting nurse for wound care and his HHA services to be reinstated, can you get that done so I can send him home? I have his information...

Me (baffled, did he really just page me knowing I am not working today?): Doc, I'm sorry but I don't remember Pt. X that well (It's a holiday weekend and I don't take work home with me, why do I even have my beeper with me anyways?), and if there are any questions there is a weekend social worker to answer them.

Doc: Oh but it's your patient, you put in the clearance form, but you did not socially clear him.

Me: (Now remembering the patient) I did not socially clear him because you told me on Friday he would not be ready till Monday, and I did not want him going home without his services, it’s a rather large wound. But if you page the weekend or evening social worker, I am sure they can answer your questions, you just dial the operator to get them...

Doc: I did actually page the weekend social worker but she told me it would not be able to happen something about insurance authorization

Me: well then there is your answer, most managed care and CHHA's are closed to referrals over the weekend, plus doesn't the patient need a wound vac too?? I began the ordering process on Friday; I believe the company said by Tuesday... it's in my note....

Doc: But SW, you if anyone can make this happen

Me: Doc, this is what you can do, at 5 pm you can dial the operator, ask for the evening social worker, it will be someone different, and they may be able to help you

Doc: So there is nothing you do right now...

Me: Not from my roof top no...

Doc: ok, I guess the patient will just have to stay here because of you

Me: (getting frustrated) Doc, please page the weekend social worker and they can explain the process to you, also read my note, everything is in there...Thanks and enjoy the long weekend.. (That may have stung a bit)

Doc: yes...then hangs up...

I then page the evening Social worker to the number I was talking to the doc on, immediately email my sup so he has record of what happened, promptly turn my pager off pager, and go back to my book and beer

Long island what?? It’s not even a real island

Dear Men in my life..

First my brothers apt. goes up in flames

Next my husband’s keys, wallet, phone and pants were stolen out of his locker at the pool last night…I mean who steals pants!!?? Why would you not just take the stuff and leave the pants!!! Thank goodness a friend lived near by and was able to lend him a pair…

All right dad, step dad, brother and father in law..what are you guys gonna throw at me this weekend??

"It’s the Jor Factor, everything in his life is always extreme"

- My mom describing my brother, whose room was gutted by a fire..And only he would laugh about it…gotta love him..thank goodness he and his roommates are safe…Ahhhh Jor always keeping us on our toes!

I was THAT girl yesterday

The one who was arguing with her man on the train

While trying not to puke allover herself

But managed to anyways

The one who dropped 60 bucks on cabs because of said reason

And could not have made it home alone

Babe, I am sorry for being THAT girl last night

It was embarrassing for the both of us

Today I will be THAT girl who Goes grocery shopping at Trader Joe’s

And will attempt to make another cake and cook dinner

Today I will be THAT girl who will do the laundry at 8 am with a smile,

And will do the dishes, gather the recycling, takes out the trash and clean the bathroom too

Babe I will make up for being THAT other girl I promise 

As long as you don’t stop being THAT POOR GUY on the rare occasion  when the time is needed..

Thanks babe

<3 Your sometimes sloppy wife..

Damn right!

"Babe I need you to Iron my Shirt for tonight"

- Hubbs- saying more things i do not like to hear

"babe we ran out of alcohol"

- Hubbs saying words i don’t like to hear